Check out my new Cheat Sheet about getting a good nights sleep. If you have children you may find these tips helpful.
It is completely free to download.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie X
Tag Archives: Mother and baby
Being a mum means…?
This week was International Women’s day, check out my blog on my other blog site: http://everyonecanbuildacastle.com
What has inspired me to write this blog, was watching and listening to a podcast by Giovanna Fletcher, which is called Happy Mum Happy Baby: https://www.giovannafletcher.com/podcasts/series-eight and she asks this as one of questions, and it got me thinking. To me its the whole experience from carry a child to watching them grow into little people and building their dreams and aspirations.
I waited quite late at 35 when I became pregnant with my son and he wasn’t planned, but I have always been maternal, and knew I wanted to have kids one day. As a kid I loved looking after other children, and babysitting for friends. I didn’t mean to become pregnant at that age, but it was how it panned out and in my twenties was out with friends a lot, and for me I had to have that time before I began thinking about having a child.
So what does it mean to you…?
We need to appreciate that every parents story is different, and its finding yourself and what is important to you.
Fill in the gap and write down what it means to you.
This is not to make you feel that you’ve been doing a bad job in anyway, but bonding and building a healthy relationship and giving them support whenever they need support with to me is whats important.
It isn’t about about changing 55 nappies in one day, but what it has taught you. I have learned a lot being a mum, like what I show my son, because he will copy so I need to set a good example, like not swearing, having a tantrum of my own and having fun. Focusing on one thing at a time and respecting my son, and his needs.
I love it when my son and I go on walks and travel with each other, visiting different places and playing football or rugby.
Every mum will probably say different things and that is fine I respect all mums out there along with fathers, but as women I feel we don’t give ourselves enough credit.
For me it is little moments, like I love it when my son and I play darts because we laugh so much, because my maths is terrible, and thank to the person who created calculators, to do the scoring,but even that I get confused, but being able to laugh at our flaws being a mum, showing your kids of who you are and having boundaries, is what is top of the list when it comes to What it means to me.
We often forget our own care and that for me is top of the list too, and whenever you can have a break to having coffee or a cup of tea, take up the opportunity its not that we need to stop caring for our children, but giving us some me time, and since being a mum time as a I said before in my blog, is precious.
My son has made it clear to me that he doesn’t like me looking at my phone all of the time and be present with him, and I will take myself away from social media and give him the attention he needs.
Kids need there space and time away from us, so in holidays he will spend a couple of days at a holiday club that is local and loves being around other kids and be away from me, and my mum and step dad will look after him too, as weekends we spend in Wimbledon where they live and have some space, and see different faces and people.
So lets work together in bringing the next generation in the world, of course if you want children, and respect us as women and what being a women means.
I have written EBooks on parenting on Amazon.co.uk and I write under the names of Carrie Challoner, Carrie Lee Holmes and Carrie Holmes.
If you’d like to be alerted of my blogs on this site, then please click the follow button and the like button so I know you are finding blogs helpful.
Many thanks for reading.
Carrie X
Its Official the new school year has begun!
Hello and welcome! Thank you for the likes of my blogs on this site, and the follows I have received. It really means a lot.
So the school year has begun and yes it is back doing the school run again, and for me I will be doing the school drop off and had to arrange transport for Monday and then again for the rest of the week ahead.
I have created a free Printable with a few tips to help kick start you, and about getting the kids involved.
This is free to download and print if you need some support in getting kids back to school, and it is all about planning ahead and getting everything together without the mad rush.
So I hope you find it useful and more blogs to come.
Many thanks for reading and downloading if you wish to.
Carrie X
When kids are driving you mad!
You have one kid wanting ice cream, another wanting a choc ice and one that wants a lolly. They may moan that they want the same as another sibling or another child and they want you to stop working and play.
Sometimes it is impossible to please all children as they are all different and so they decide themselves of what they want and actually they are saying “I want to be equal”. That is possible but when kids have strops its them being a kid and being definant.
Am I saying that this isn’t bad behaviour?
No, they need to learn communication and how to speak to other adults and kids in a kindly manner, but kids do come with hazards, like Wining, stamping their foot and one sentence my son says now and that is “I am not listening”. So say to them “Kind words” and “I am not listening too” and when I ignore him, he will then be the one who comes over to me to be sweet again.
You do have to stand your ground and let them know if they are crossing bad boundaries and you like “Polite children” but don’t go on and on about it. As I get fed up of people saying the same thing, but with a kids it may need to be repeated for them to get how they should communicate and how to still express themselves.
Kids will pick up bad behaviour at school and he has been spending time in a class where all the difficult kids go to prevent kids who aren’t separated. but for me that method is wrong. All kids should be included and be a cause of a child playing up. Remember kids still have feelings and emotions and for me is putting out a bad message to kids. You can badly bahave and we will segrigate you with other kids who play up and you get to play still but away from good behaved kids.
Even writing that I shake my head as kids learn from both type of kids and its learning how to be with other kids for when they build relations when they are older. For me it is encouraging bad behaviour not stopping it.
Remember the strops and shouting will stop and can be avoided if they see good behaved children and being a role model myself.
I want Henry to have a wonderful childhood filled with good memories and fun, but not encourage when they drive you up the wall.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie X
Truth about Parenting/Having a hobby
Hello and check out my new Truth about parenting video, talking about how good it is for your kids to have a hobby.
I always had a hobby as a kid and so did my brother, and I would encourage swimming lessons, as this is a good way for them to be confident about water and learn how to swim.
If it is a sports club then why not learn to do sports coaching yourself. I am FA Qualified and ready to do my other badges, as you can set up a sports club for your child.
So I hope you enjoy this video thank you for your time,
Carrie X
What to know about Premature Babies
This time seven years ago, I was in the neon natal ward in Epsom, looking after my son Henry, who was born prematurely at 31 weeks and there are a lot of things that you should know about What to know about Premature Babies.
- The hospital before you give birth whether naturally or by Caesarean, they will give you an injection to help the babies lungs, as if born premature their lungs would not have been fully formed, depending on, when the baby arrives
- They can have trouble breastfeeding which I have written about in my previous blogs, and so if they don’t latch on don’t worry , you can still express and give to your baby by bottle or the neon natal nurses would help to feed them by a cup. Yes they do. I didn’t know they did this, but I saw it in my own eyes, and was amazed
- They can be prone to chest infections in their early years. Don’t worry, seek medical support and they may prescribe and inhaler and antibiotics, but you can use over the counter products, like Calpol, Vics and Oabis Oil
- They become full term babies usually around the 8 weeks of their lives
- If they are Jaundice they will be in a incubator, if first born with a little mask on to protect their eyes, with a blue light
- They will continuously have blood taken from their foot to make sure they don’t have a metabolic disorder
- They are regularly weighed, have their length measure and their head circumference measured
- They will test their ears to see how sharp their hearing is
- Have Development Delay
- Be prone to having Reflux issues
Please do not feel that I am scaremongering in any way, I just want give this information because not many parenting books I have read or blogs, share this information, but want to be one of the first, as Premature births are a lot more common than you think. When I talked to people about Henry being Premature, I had many parents or people saying they were born premature too.
I have one more thing to tell you, and that is, I am raising money for the charity called, Tommy’s who support and raise awareness, of Stillbirths and Premature Births, and so if you would like to make a contribution, please follow the link below:
https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/theparentingadventuresprematurebirths
If you would like to read many of my other posts I write on my different websites then follow this link below:
https://carriesblognetwork.squarespace.com/
Many thanks for reading,
Carries X
P.S: I have teamed up with Amazon this year, to show some of their Christmas Gifts, Advent Calendars, Decor, Stocking Fillers and much more. Check out my first video showing their Top Of the Range Advent Calendars:
Stop feeling guilty as a parent
Why do we put so much pressure and guilt on ourselves?
A question I ask myself all the time. I am fed up of feeling guilty. I know I am a good person, its just at times I feel I need to reach out and express how I am feeling and what is going on with my life to get it out of my system and to help others who may be going through the same thing.
Why is that such a crime?
I wrote a similar blog some time ago, see below:
Do What You Got To Do And Stop Feeling Guilty
At the moment things are not great but I am keeping my head up high ignoring the critters and trying to be the best person I can, trying to make a living with my blogs, but yet with some people that appears to be wrong, and yet they are okay to say how they feel towards me.
As far as I am concerned it is two way street. As a parent I often feel guilty but I think why, my son is in no distress, he is still very cheerful and is full of life.Â
I wrote a blog about:
How to support your kids through a marriage break up
It is a topic that is very common and hard to deal with at times, but when people get involved who has nothing to do with it, makes it worse and you end up being the one who carries the guilt.
Why?
I never judged them when they were going through a marriage break up, and when my mum and dad got divorced it was tough, hence why I moved away in the end, because I just couldn’t face it anymore.
I now feel the same… driven away.
This may be hard for people to read, perhaps because people can go into denial and pass the buck, but at the end of the day, why should I be given emotional black mail when if the tables were turned I would never dream of reacting the same.
Not one person can really get to grips with how another person is feeling only they know and judging other people is a no no in my book.
Just because it is something they wouldn’t do doesn’t make it wrong, so stop judging, stop making other people feel guilty and let people bring up their children as they wish, and stop the pressure and the guilt tripping, when we all know how hard it can be, to be a parent.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie X
Preparing for a baby
Preparing for a baby can be mind boggling as there are so many different products out there, that it can be pretty overwhelming and lets face it expensive too.
Congratulations to Prince Harry and Meghan, on their new addition, their baby boy, Archie. It’s time for those sleepiness nights and nappy changing, and life does change from this point forward.
I wish I had been more prepared, and one piece of advice I would give to parents to be, is to set up a hospital bag as soon as possible. If I had realised and done my research beforehand, I would have made sure I had everything I needed, as my waters breaking at 31 weeks was a shock.
The items you will need are:
- Baby wipes
- Breast pads
- Maternity pads
- Cotton wool balls
- Nappies
- Couple of baby clothes, babygrows and couple of vests, of different sizes just in case
Please don’t spend money on a fancy changing bag, any bag will do as long as it got a few compartments and can fit in your items.
Make sure you have a cot, preferably one that can be leveled down, as your baby grows and you have a baby monitor in case baby is sleeping in another room.
You can also purchase a baby chair which rocks the baby back and forwards, but not necessarily needed to begin with, but is up to you.
Get as much sleep as you can, as when the baby comes sleep deprivation can be tough and for my husband and I this was a culture shock, and took a lot of time to adjust.
Remember to enjoy your baby, and that the time flies by so try to make the most of each day, as before you know it they are starting school.
I wish I had been more relaxed and I think if I had prepared myself a lot more I would have been.
I hope you find this blog useful and remember if you would like to be kept up to date with my posts then you can do by following me on WordPress.com.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie X
Being Organised
I would not say I am the most organised person in the world, in fact yesterday Henry was supposed to have Mufti day (own clothes day) at school, as it was Science day yesterday, and I totally forgot and put Henry in his school uniform and it was only when I left the house I remembered.
However if I had prepared the night before and checked my emails I wouldn’t have forgotten and would have had him ready, but never mind one slip up isn’t going to hurt and Henry wasn’t bothered so I didn’t let myself worry about it either.
Being a mum it does help to be organised, and the one thing I always make sure I put out ready the night before is his uniform, which is all hung up in the living room ready, for me to put together, along with underpants, his book bag, his socks and shoes and his backpack.
Check out this picture below I found on Pinterest which gives some more tips on how to be organised as a mum.
The other ways to being organised, is to have a routine and to get ready gradually as you get nearer to the time to getting them to school. Check out my blog in the link below which talks more about Getting ready for school.
https://theparentingadventurestipsandtricks.wordpress.com/?s=getting+ready+for+school
Leave with plenty of time and try to leave at the same time. Get bags packed the night before, and put any last minute bits together as soon as you get up in the morning.
Have a notebook to hand to create a brain dump to keep tabs on what you need to get done on the day.
Set days as side to catch up on laundry and cleaning, and if you need time out from the normal daily chores then do so, you deserve the break.
Check out this video below by Emily Norris who shares her top ten tips that helps her to stay organised.
Post updated.View Post
Remember bribery is not a bad thing when it comes to children, it is good to have snacks to hand just in case your child needs to distracted or gets hungry and will tide them over until meal time.
Please remember to subscribe and follow me should you want to read more of my blogs coming up soon.
If you have any questions or need support when it comes to parenting then why not get in contact with me via my form on my feedback page and I will provide some information and give as much support as I can.
Feedback
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie X
Handling Bad Behaviour
So yesterday we (my husband and I) were spoken to by one of the teachers at my sons school, because our son has been pinching other children.
The one thing they are trying to install which we are starting to do at home is say to our son Kind hands and Kind feet. We don’t pinch other children because it hurts and not nice for his friends when he pinches them.
We do use time out, I will give Henry a warning and then if he continues to misbehave I will put him in his bedroom for time out, and explain to him that this is not good, and his behaviour is making me sad, not happy.
This does tend to work, and today he would’t put on his shoes. I did tell him off, because he just was for no reason was refusing to put them on. So I explained to him firmly that this is not good and his behaviour is not acceptable and that he needs to put on his shoes otherwise we can’t go to school. I did let him know he was making me sad, and he reacted to this by wanting to give me a hug and then he let me put his shoes and socks.
Shouting and ranting doesn’t in my book work, and makes you look like you are having a tantrum which can cause their (the child’s) behaviour to get worse. So staying calm but being firm is the key to handling bad behaviour. Usually with the same with biting it can be a sign the are trying to communicate, our son does get frustrated when he feels he can’t put his point across, however he still needs to understand that pinching is not the way to go about it, and it has to stop.
Children will misbehave, and it is how you react and respond that can make all the difference.
If you need to leave the room to count to ten do so, as sometimes it can get too much. It can feel like there is no resolution, but remember it won’t last forever and that it is just a fly in the moment thing and it will pass.
Here are some quick tips to help difficult behaviour:
- Do what feels right. What you do has to be right for your child, yourself and the family. …
- Don’t give up. Once you’ve decided to do something, continue to do it. …
- Be consistent. …
- Try not to overreact. …
- Talk to your child. …
- Be positive about the good things. …
- Offer rewards. …
- Avoid smacking.
If you have any questions or need support when it comes to parenting then why not get in contact with me via my form on my feedback page and I will provide some information and give as much support as I can.
https://theparentingadventurestipsandtricks.wordpress.com/feedback/
I hope you find this useful, and many thanks for reading,
Carrie X
The parenting adventures 